Are You Being a Godly Wife? 22 Common Mistakes Even Christian Women Make

Not many are up to the challenge of being a godly wife, a role that many Christian women aspire to. While the intention is pure, the execution can sometimes fall short in these 22 common ways, even for devout women.

Failing to Prioritize Your Relationship with God

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For a godly wife, the cornerstone of her life should be her relationship with God. Often, the hustle of daily life leads to neglecting personal time with God, like prayer or scripture study. This shift, though subtle, can have a significant impact on her spiritual health and, by extension, her marital harmony.

Neglecting Open Communication with Your Spouse

Lack of Emotional Investment
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Effective communication is the lifeline of any marriage. A common misstep is assuming your partner understands your needs and feelings without explicit communication. This assumption can lead to misunderstandings and emotional distance, which are obstacles to creating a strong, godly marriage.

Disrespecting Your Spouse in Disagreements

Pick Your Battles
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Every marriage faces disagreements, but the manner of handling these differences sets the tone for a healthy relationship. The ideal Christian wife must avoid disrespectful attitudes or harsh words during conflicts, as they can erode the essential foundation of trust and mutual respect in the marriage.

Overemphasizing Parental Roles Over Marital Bonds

Parents Not Parenting
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Balancing the roles of spouse and parent is a tightrope walk. Overemphasis on parental duties at the expense of your marital relationship can create an imbalance. Striving for equilibrium shows children the importance of a strong, loving partnership, a cornerstone of a godly household.

Letting Intimacy Slide

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Intimacy is a critical component of marriage, often neglected due to life’s busyness. When intimacy wanes, it can create a divide, weakening the connection between spouses. A perfect wife recognizes the importance of maintaining this bond and makes concerted efforts to keep the spark alive.

Ignoring Your Spouse’s Spiritual Needs

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A godly wife not only nurtures her spiritual growth but also supports her spouse’s spiritual journey. Focusing solely on personal spirituality can create an imbalance, whereas encouraging each other’s faith journey strengthens the marriage’s spiritual unity.

Holding Grudges and Not Practicing Forgiveness

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Forgiveness is a foundational Christian principle, especially in marriage. Holding onto past mistakes or grudges can create bitterness, damaging the relationship. Ideally, a godly wife embraces forgiveness, recognizing it as essential for a healthy, Christ-centered marriage.

Undermining Your Spouse’s Leadership

Inconsistent Communication
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In a Christian marriage, mutual respect is crucial. Undermining your spouse’s decisions or leadership can create discord. A godly wife supports her partner’s role while confidently contributing her perspectives, creating a balance of respect and shared decision-making.

Maintaining a Negative Attitude

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A consistently negative or critical attitude can strain even the strongest marriages. By maintaining a positive and hopeful outlook, especially in challenging times, a godly wife helps to foster a nurturing and supportive home environment.

Succumbing to Materialism

People Expecting You To Accept and Be OK With All Their Issues but Would Never Ever Accept 1_ of That From You
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The lure of materialism can distract from a marriage’s spiritual focus. The perfect example of a godly wife avoids placing undue emphasis on possessions or wealth, instead prioritizing spiritual richness and contentment in her marital life.

Engaging in Gossip

Gossipping
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Gossip can be harmful, not just to others but also to one’s own spirit and marriage.  An ideal Christian bride is careful with her words, choosing to uplift and speak truthfully, thereby preserving the integrity of her relationships and her own spiritual walk.

Isolating from Christian Community

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Isolation from Christian fellowship or disregarding wise counsel can lead to spiritual drift. A godly wife values the support and insight of trusted Christian friends and mentors, recognizing their role in sustaining a healthy, faith-filled marriage.

Neglecting to Pray for Your Spouse

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Regularly praying for your spouse is a powerful way to support them spiritually. Neglecting this practice can weaken the couple’s spiritual bond. The textbook godly woman makes it a priority to lift her husband in prayer, seeking God’s guidance and blessings for him.

Not Participating in Shared Ministry

Preacher_Pastor_Minister
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Not participating alongside your spouse in ministry opportunities can lead to a disconnect in shared spiritual goals. A godly wife engages in mutual ministry, thus fostering a deeper spiritual connection and shared sense of purpose.

Exhibiting Pride Instead of Humility

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Pride can subtly undermine a marriage. Wherever she can, a godly wife practices humility, acknowledging her shortcomings and striving for personal growth and betterment within the relationship, thus enhancing the marital bond.

Showing Impatience in Your Marriage

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Patience is a virtue, especially in marriage. Impatience, particularly during stressful times, can harm the relationship. To the best of her ability, a Christian wife works on cultivating patience, understanding that personal and relational growth often takes time and perseverance.

Offering Conditional Instead of Unconditional Love

Communicate Openly
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Conditional love can undermine the essence of a Christian marriage. A person trying to become a godly wife strives to offer unconditional love, reflecting Christ’s love, regardless of her spouse’s actions or achievements, thereby strengthening the marital bond.

Providing Destructive Rather than Constructive Criticism

Setting Boundaries
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Criticism, if not handled carefully, can be damaging. A godly wife aims to provide constructive criticism that builds up her spouse, rather than tearing them down, thus fostering a supportive and loving environment.

Disregarding Your Spouse’s Opinions

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A godly wife actively listens and values her partner’s perspectives, ensuring a respectful and equitable relationship. Disregarding your spouse’s opinions or ideas can lead to feelings of insignificance or resentment. 

Not Living Authentically in Faith

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Inconsistency between professed beliefs and actions can weaken a godly wife’s testimony. Living authentically in faith, both in words and deeds is crucial for setting a positive example in the marriage and beyond.

Resisting Change and Growth

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Resisting change or personal growth can impede both individual and marital development. A person after the title ‘Godly Wife’  sees change as an opportunity to grow together in faith and love, embracing new challenges and experiences as a couple.

Failing to Celebrate Your Spouse’s Achievements

Overprotective In A Bad Way
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The godly wife takes joy in her partner’s successes, big or small, recognizing and affirming their accomplishments and contributions. Neglecting to celebrate your spouse’s achievements can lead to feelings of underappreciation.

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