His Wife Keeps Self-Diagnosing Herself With Mental Disorders and He’s Fed Up With It

A man recently contacted the Reddit community to ask if he was wrong for telling his wife to stop discussing her mental health issues publicly. 

Here’s what he had to say. 

woman ocd
Photo Credit: Shutterstock.

The man, 29, explains that his wife’s ‘new hobby’ is to talk about the fact that she has a host of mental conditions, including depression, ADHD, OCD, PTSD, and anxiety. 

“I told her that if she is concerned about having these conditions, we should seriously go to a mental health professional to get her evaluated,” he said. 

His wife refuses to go to a doctor because, according to her, “she doesn’t need anyone else’s validation.”

The man told her that it was not about getting validation. It’s about finding resources to help her live a better life and cope with her mental struggles. 

His wife still refuses to go, which annoys the man as they have great mental health resources available and clinics nearby, and they have enough money to afford an evaluation. 

The man also feels that his wife uses her self-diagnosed conditions to get out of her responsibilities. 

“She recently stopped doing her share of chores because her “ADHD is so distracting” and it just stresses her out too much to fight it,” he said. 

One time, they were making cupcakes for her niece’s birthday, and the man frosted them in purple instead of blue while she was in the bathroom. 

When she returned, she made him redo the frosting because, apparently, the purple color was triggering her OCD. 

He said, “when I tried to tell her it wasn’t a big deal, she got upset at me for belittling her mental health.” 

The man has never accused his wife of lying to take advantage of a situation because he wants to give her the benefit of the doubt. 

“Maybe she genuinely does have something going on, or maybe she just doesn’t understand that mental health disorders aren’t trivial personality traits,” he explained. 

But the man feels that his wife uses any opportunity to talk about her mental health struggles and sometimes feels like she doesn’t take it seriously. 

Recently they were at a family reunion at his sister’s house. And his sister has struggled with debilitating seasonal affective disorder and seasonal depression since she was a child. 

He asked her how her new lightbox was working, and she told him she was seeing improvements. 

“My wife jumped in and said that she has seasonal depression too, and all my sister needs to do is drink more caffeine and power through the day because that’s what worked for her,” the man said. 

The man’s sister was clearly uncomfortable, so she laughed it off and said thanks for the suggestion. But the man was annoyed because he was having a serious conversation with his sister, and his wife just made it out to be nothing. 

He then became angry when his wife said that the sister shouldn’t laugh and should take it seriously if she wanted to improve her condition as ‘a fellow survivor’. 

He told his wife to stop talking about her undiagnosed mental health issues in public because they don’t actually have confirmation that she has seasonal affective disorder. 

‘My wife acted shocked that I said this and stopped talking to me for the rest of the evening,” the man said, and she now says that he has made her out to be a liar. 

So the man asked the Reddit community if he was in the wrong for telling her not to talk about her mental struggles in public, but most of them agreed with him. 

One user said, “your wife is definitely using those mental health labels to push away responsibilities… which is why it’s even more important that she go see a professional.” 

Another wrote, “It sounds like she is simply weaponizing mental health struggles (that she’s heard about) against OP and family, so she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to.” 

Source: Reddit

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