A guy recently asked for advice online on whether he was wrong for refusing to pay for his girlfriend’s child.
Here’s what he had to say.
The new couple initially met on Tinder. In the beginning, things were going well, but they were both still open to meeting other people.
As things started to get more serious between them, the girl suddenly found out she was pregnant!
When the baby was eventually born, it was evident that the guy was not the father. Her ex was.
However, they were happy together, and the pregnancy didn’t cause them to break up.
The guy admits that he was actually kind of excited about starting a family. He even suggested that his girlfriend take a year off work to be with the baby.
The girlfriend told the guy that she didn’t intend to ask the father for child support because she wanted to remain friends with him. The guy agreed to this but with his own conditions.
He would help bring up the baby and even help with feeding and changing diapers, but she would have to accept that he would not be financially responsible.
The girlfriend agreed, but it was only a short time before the bills started piling up. Taking time off work and with a never-ending supply of diapers, baby formula, and new clothes needed, the girlfriend ran through all of her savings within six months.
The guy explained that they then had a conversation where his girlfriend asked him to help with the costs of the baby. He had to remind her then of their agreement months before.
Eventually, the girlfriend had no choice and phoned the baby’s father to ask him for help with the costs.
She didn’t exactly get the response she was expecting. His solution was to give her a few thousand dollars but with one little condition attached. She was never to contact him ever again.
So much for friendship.
The guy tells how his girlfriend then pursued the baby’s father properly for realistic child support.
That’s when the father’s new girlfriend, whom he was engaged to be married to, found out about the baby and the whole situation. The father phoned in tears saying his fiancé was threatening to break off their engagement and break up with him. He said they had messed up his whole life, that the guy was responsible, and that he could easily have contributed to the costs of the baby himself.
The father agreed to child support, but the guy’s girlfriend felt bad about the whole thing. She thought that the guy should have thought of her as a single mum and helped with what he could.
The guy says he loves his girlfriend and is happy to bring up the child but still thinks he was right not to accept financial responsibility when the father was around and tried to get out of contributing.
Do you think the girlfriend was being too soft on the baby’s father? Was the guy wrong to insist that he wouldn’t help financially?
