A man recently asked the Reddit community whether he was wrong for not making an effort at his girlfriend’s work dinner.
Here’s what he had to say.
His girlfriend has a great relationship with her boss.
They go for dinner or lunch together regularly and can have both work and personal conversations.
In fact, they are very friendly outside of work. Even though his girlfriend always looks very clean and put together, “she also isn’t a very professional dresser in my opinion, not the way an office lady usually looks.”
The man explains that she rarely wears makeup, keeps her hair in a short cut and does nothing to style it. Furthermore, she only ever wears pants to work, never a dress or skirt, and only button-downs and blazers.
“I love her, and I love that her work environment makes her feel comfortable enough to dress like that .”Although she likes makeup, she prefers to be bare-faced or go for dramatic looks that aren’t appropriate for the office. “Rarely she’ll put on some lipstick and basic contouring.”
So, when the girlfriend asked him to join a work dinner, he didn’t think it would be a formal occasion. He asked her what she was wearing, and she said nice slacks, a button-down, and a blazer. Telling him that he would be fine to wear something similar, he dressed in dark blue jeans and a nicely pressed black and white plaid flannel button down.
According to the man, he’d also noticed on a FaceTime call that she was wearing white eyeliner, which didn’t exactly scream ‘professional.’
When he showed up, he quickly realized not only were there more people than just his girlfriend and her boss, but he was the only person wearing jeans.
One of his girlfriend’s coworkers was wearing a polo and khakis trousers, though, which he felt was equal to his outfit. “No one looked twice at my clothes, and we all had a good time. It was a nonissue”.
The couple planned to stay the night together, but when they got to their cars, she said she didn’t want to anymore because she was mad at him. Apparently, “I didn’t dress appropriately for dinner,” she told him,
The man looked at her and said he dressed just as appropriately as she did because there was nothing business appropriate about wearing white eyeliner. She just laughed in his face and cursed him off.
The man went home and tried texting and calling his girlfriend, but she just told him to leave her alone and refused to discuss the fight.
“Not all women need to wear skirts to be professional, but you match the formality of your boss in the workplace, and my girlfriend is the only woman in the office that never wears a dress or skirt in contrast to her boss.”
On reflection, he felt he could have dressed it up with a jacket. But he asked the Reddit community if he was wrong for not dressing up enough for a work dinner.
One commenter said, “You picking apart her physical appearance makes you double the AH. Why do you think women need to wear makeup and have special hair-dos for work? From what I read, her work is business professional, and she meets it. How she “looks” is irrelevant.”
Another noted, “Something tells me she’s mad at him for his general misogynistic views on her appearance, and this instance was just the last straw.”
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