A woman who has been controlled by her family for years recently told her family she wouldn’t be moving into a new house with them despite her mother being ill. Here’s what she had to say.
The woman’s mother made them stay home
Throughout their upbringing, the 24-year-old woman and her older sister lived with their parents under strict rules enforced by their mother, especially for the younger daughter. The younger daughter’s social outings were limited, and she was only allowed to leave the house for school-related matters or after-school activities.
She moved out of her parent’s house to go to college
“When college rolled around, I decided to move out to explore my own freedom,” she said.
When she was 22, doctors discovered a tumor in her mother’s brain, and she underwent surgery, chemo, and radiation.
She moved back home
During the peak of the Covid pandemic, the woman made the decision to move back home and assist her sister in caring for their mother. They recognized the need to minimize the risk of exposure by limiting their outings and ensuring their mother’s safety and well-being.
She was stuck in the house
Fast forward two years to when their mother was better, and she returned to her strict ways.
The 24-year-old woman was not allowed to leave the house, and if she did, she had to be home by 9 pm.
Her family would pester her if she left the house
She would receive multiple calls from her family telling her to come home.
“My sister would tell me that my mom would get headaches and small seizures if I didn’t come home, and I would often be told that I’m not a good sister/daughter if I choose to leave the house,” she said.
The family’s behavior got worse
Initially, she thought this only happened when she hung out with friends, but it also happened when she visited her cousins.
Each time she left the house, her mother would say she was going to get a headache, making her feel guilty for leaving.
She was banned from leaving the house most days
The older sister imposed a rule that the woman could only leave the house once a week at most.
“During this time, I don’t neglect my housework. I cook, clean, buy groceries, and give my mom her medicine. I also work from home every day to keep an eye out for my mom,” she said.
Her mother got sick again
Recently, the mother finished her second round of chemo, and the family has been using this against the woman whenever she chooses to go somewhere outside the house.
They tell her she’s not prioritizing her family and is choosing others over her mother.
“I honestly feel like a child and don’t have any control over my life anymore,” she said.
They want the woman to move to a new house with them
Now she faces a dilemma because her family has decided to buy a house outside of the city due to high living costs. They wanted her to move with them, but she refused.
“I said no because me leaving the house is already such a huge problem that I only see getting worse if I move further from the city. My family is telling me that they won’t move without me and are making me feel like this is my only choice,” she explained.
She asked the internet for advice
She offered them money to help them move but didn’t want to go with them.
With her family refusing to move without her, she turned to the internet for advice.
People responded
One user replied, “Your mom is using her illness to trap you. Get out. This living situation isn’t healthy for anyone.”
Another user said, “You are 24 and are very much in the FOG. Fear, Obligation, Guilt. You aren’t seeing how much control they have over you because it’s gone on so long.”
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Images are for illustrative purposes only
Source: Reddit
