A young man is uncomfortable going away for the summer to his wife’s family home. He believes her family treats him poorly because of his race and language differences. Here is what the young father has to say.
Spending Summer with the In-laws
The man’s wife had just given birth to a son Andy, and she wanted to stay with her extended family for at least a month. This way, her other family members would get to meet her new baby. But her husband had his reservations about staying that long.
The In-Laws are Nasty to Him
The man does not want to spend up to a month with his wife’s family because they are always mean to him whenever they spend holidays together. This has happened all through the six years he has been with his wife.
It All Started With His Proposal and Wedding
When the man proposed to his wife, her family did not fail to hide their disdain for him. On the day his wife called to share the good news with them, her mother went mute and said, “I’m in a shoe shop; we’ll call you back.” Planning the wedding was another hassle, as his wife’s family always complained about the logistics. They believed the wedding cost was ridiculously high.
No Hellos or Goodbyes
The man’s wife has an uncle who has never said a word of greeting to him; this has been going on since he started a relationship with her. The uncle was also noticeably absent at the couple’s wedding party for “medical reasons.” According to the man, “he is known as being very right wing in the family.”
Other Ways His In-Laws Have Treated Him Badly
Apart from the uncle, the man complained about how one of his wife’s cousins enjoyed making distasteful racist jokes and comments. Things are so bad that his father-in-law once refused to speak to him while they were both on a 45-minute trip.
His In-Laws Wanted to Control Their Lives
According to the man, his wife’s family always made comments about how much they weighed, their jobs, “and how we should live, generally speaking.” Whenever they were in the country, the family wanted the wife to see only the family doctor and no one else, which the man found strange.
The Fight
The man’s refusal to spend at least a month with his in-laws made his wife somewhat angry. This led to an argument between the couple, because his wife said she felt isolated and far from her family. According to her, he is taking a “negative approach.”
Alone in His Fight
Although the man tried to make his wife understand his perspective, she didn’t completely agree. She said he had a “bad mentality” toward her other family members. So, she does not see why they should spend only two weeks.
History and Evidence
Wanting his wife to see his point, the man reminded her of past events when her family members were mean to him. Things got so heated that she cried and refused to speak to him. While trying to understand her point, he believed his wife did not give him that same benefit.
The People Give Their Opinions
The man decided to bring his dilemma online, and he got responses from other people in no time. One person said, “Correct me if I’m wrong: her family constantly ignores and/or bullies you. She doesn’t realize/care that you feel like an outcast there. When you explain that you feel like an outcast there, she proceeds to make you feel like an outcast in your own home. What a gem. NTA.”
Another person said, “NTA; they’re racists, and still, you want to spend two weeks with them for your wife’s sake. Go get yourself a gold medal; you deserve it!”
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Source: Reddit
